2014 signaled the year of a new me. Let 2019 signal a new year for you.

It seems that nowadays more than ever, people are finding excuses to put off plans for the future. Most of us millennials are in the same boat. We want for the same things in life that our parents want, but it just costs an arm and a leg for what cost them 10% of their paycheck. Life for us is literally living paycheck to paycheck and in a world where making progress revolves around having money, it might seem like we don’t have many options in terms of realizing our dreams. Rent, mortgage, insurance- pretty much everything that the previous generation had costs more and there isn’t much we can do about it if we don’t take the initiative to do more. Let’s face it. We are pretty much screwed financially as a generation. That being said- this is our life! Lets make the best of it! We can do more than we are currently doing. We have all the tools needed to make a complete 180 (okay maybe not a complete 180) on what our life currently looks like! If you have a goal for 2019, you CAN make the goal come true. It’ll just take a little bit of confidence, initiative, and perseverance. Here’s my story!

2013. 4th Qtr. Who am I? I’m pretty much your average guy- 6' 0", skinny, no muscle, with just education to show for what I’ve accomplished in life and I.was.miserable. I can’t say that I was depressed but I wasn’t sure of what the future held. I was still living off my parents’ income, had recently broken up with my girlfriend due to distance issues (more on that later), and had just moved to the Midwest to work on my Master’s degree, which I was doing because I didn’t know what else to do in life. I was literally doing more schooling because it was so ingrained in my head by my parents that I defaulted to school when I didn’t know what the path forward was (RIP Student loans).

Before I forget, let me explain about my then girlfriend. I’ve been in a relationship with my ex for almost 3 years at the end of 2013. During these times, life was great but insecurities born from past relationships led to my ex being the kind of woman that would call you 3 to 5 times within 3 hours if she couldn’t see you. The problem? My ex lived in New York and I moved to Michigan with no returning to New York for the foreseeable future so you could see where it would go wrong pretty quickly. In hindsight, maybe I should have made a romantic gesture like offering to have her come with me to Michigan but I was too immature for all that back then. One of the friends from New York said “you won’t stay with your first girlfriend,” and I didn’t really believe him but I guess he turned to be right. #gonebutneverforgetten Okay back to my life. P.S. She was a nice girl for those who think I’m trying to bash her.

2014 was a different kind of year for me. I was in the Midwest and wanted to be a different person. No one knew me, therefore no one knew that I was shy and basically had no interests besides games, school, and girls which, given my personality at the time, meant I obviously couldn’t get any girls. I decided that while I pursued my schooling, I would also work on improving my social life. In order to do that, I knew I had to make a change to my personality so the first thing I did, like many of you out there, was to go on YouTube and look up “How to pick up girls,” where I subsequently spent many waking hours looking at Simple PickUp. Good times. Surprisingly, I did learn a few useful things from their channel, the most important lesson being, just do it. “Practice makes perfect” applies to pretty much nothing in life but “Practice makes better,” applies to everything in life.

I decided to just do it. I went to bars/clubs and social gatherings and even though I didn’t know how to dance, went onto the dance floor and moved my little body as best I could all the while keeping a stupid grin on my face. “Fake it till you make it” was my slogan and it ruled the first 6 months of my “personality transformation.” The whole time, I was panicking inside thinking, “man I’m such a loser for doing this.” Here’s the funny part about faking things though. People can’t tell unless you’re doing a particularly bad job. I was faking but everyone is sitting there thinking, “Wow this guy is really confident and fun,” or something to that effect- I’m not a mind reader. It was the first time in awhile that I’ve had fun in a social setting! Before I knew it, I had plenty of friends and actually found myself thinking “I can really do this!” (If you’ve read this far and want to hear about the dreaded Friend Zone, comment “Friend Zone” in the comments)

Fast forward a year later into 2015 and I can’t even remember what it feels like to be that shy guy, much less now in 2019. I know many people that would say “I can’t help it. Its just who I am.” This couldn’t be further from the truth. Confidence and being social is something that comes naturally to some but it is something that you can work on and eventually it will become second nature to you. Many of us will say “I get too nervous when it comes to speaking in front of crowds” and will take a public speaking class. The same concept applies here. In 2019, I want you to go out and make huge changes. Many of you are exactly who I was in 2014 and you CAN be more. Make 2019 your year. Remember, who you are can affect every aspect of your life. I want you to work on your personality and your ethics first because that will give you the confidence to take on other challenges in life. I can attest to the fact that my more outgoing personality has helped me in my life getting jobs and making connections with others. It also helped me get to the point where I am willing to try and make a change to take on the challenge left to us from the previous generation. Join me!

P.S. If you want to hear more, leave a comment letting me know! Also, feel free to let your friends know. There’s a lot that I would like to talk about and would appreciate it if I knew I was being heard by others :)

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